The Bad Boy in Esther's class

I used to homeschool my children -- all of them. Nowadays, I have one official homeschooler and two little ones who are learning every moment they are at home (and anywhere else, for that matter).

I have LOADS of reasons to homeschool! When I was a college student and I was introduced to the concept of homeschooling, the first thing that came to mind was: "Oooohh! I wish I could have been homeschooled!"

It sounded so great -- to be able to use my time according to my own interests and not have to play the "game" of figuring out what the teacher wanted and trying to meet those requirements rather than trying to get educated.

And, surprise, surprise, I struggled in the social area.

For the first six miserable years of my public schooling, I was the nerd. After that, I somehow broke out of my shell and learned to smile and enjoy some of what public school had to offer in the area of social life... I even got voted onto the homecoming court my senior year.

So, I can't say the social reasons are my biggest reasons to choose homeschooling, but they are definitely counted among them.

When my oldest child, who has an October birthday -- which translates into being the oldest in the class, was already reading before he even started kindergarten, I thought, "Hey! I'll give him the gift I never had: the gift of not having to deal with all the drama at school."

No homework (although some could argue that all of homeschool is homework); no tests; no grading; no kids to bully you...

Well, for a variety of reasons, which I won't list here, that oldest son (plus my twin daughters) are now in public school. Maybe they'll decide to homeschool again... maybe not. At this point, I'm leaving it up to them.

Every once in a while, they'll describe some situation going on at school, and I try really hard to figure out how to interject into the conversation something along the lines of: "Hmmmm, I wonder if we ever had a similar situation when we homeschooled. Hmmmm..."

One of the recent issues Esther has discussed with me is the bad boy in her class. The teacher has been losing her patience with him lately, particularly about how he doesn't ever do his homework. She threatened that he would have to miss recess if he doesn't start bringing back worksheets.

Of course, I'm not there having to deal with him day in and day out. I think that is the main reason I was able to have the imaginary response as follows:

Compassion towards the boy, who must be the victim of apathetic parents.

Sincere concern about his future and deep ponderings about how to help him move past the obstacle of an undesirable home life.

Calm replies to his claims of having not done the homework, and encouragement and motivation to put in the extra effort, even if it means missing recess.

It's so easy for me to conjure up such happy images, because I am not an underpaid, overworked teacher having to handle not just the bad boy, but twenty-eight other children as well, five days a week.

I sometimes wish I could homeschool that bad boy! Give him the gift that I always wanted, and that I hope three of my children will soon figure out they want as well.

Wise Words of Other Mothers

I'm hurrying and writing this blog post before I head off to my book club!

I. LOVE. MY. BOOK. CLUB.

Well, more accurately, I love the women who attend the club.

I do, in fact, love to read books and discuss them -- it's a great challenge for my brain to

1) manage my time effectively to the point where I can fit in reading a book a month
2) pay close enough attention to what I am reading to get something out of it that's worthy to share

However, when it comes right down to it, I would get together with these women even if it were a knitting club.

Admittedly, knitting would also be a challenge for my brain.

My overall point of this post, though, is how grateful I am for these women. They are busy moms, too. Most of them homeschool their children. Yet they take time out to bless my life by sharing their thoughts, their wisdom, their talents.

Ya see, it's a multi-faceted book club, in that we spend the first hour or so doing things other than discussing the book. We sing together! We eat -- it's ALWAYS a potluck. We share each others good news -- as well as our burdens. And THEN we discuss the book -- solid discussions, with lots of insights and applications to our lives.

It's like an intellectual challenge wrapped up in a hug!

I cherish my time with these women, wise women, whose wise words come home with me and help me in my attempts to become wise.

I'll take time to type it again, even though I must jump up and run out the door:

I. LOVE. MY. BOOK. CLUB!!!

Gimme an "S!" (the SMILE acronym)

As I was mulling over what I might say about the first letter in my "SMILE" acronym -- "Support," -- a greeting card came to mind about how good friends are like good bras... yeah, well, I suppose talking about over-the-shoulder-boulder-holders shouldn't be beneath me. I've talked about vomit! I'm a mom! Is there anything off-limits?

Actually, this little bantering in my own head about "what will people think?!" really gets to the root of reasons why we moms might NOT reach out and give *or get* the Support we need... We're too worried about judgements of our co-workers!

Think how nice it would be to come together after a long week of being in charge, running a household... We'd pile up a plate of refreshments (plenty of chocolate), hug each other and do that little kiss-in-the-air-near-your-cheek thing that's so endearing. We'd introduce ourselves, a little apprehensively:

"Hi, I'm Regan, and I'm a mom. It's been 12 years now. And I... still... make mistakes." The rest of you wonderful mom-friends would make sweet little noises that were like verbal pats-on-the-back.

Then we'd talk about one of the twelve steps...

Oooooohhhh, I just hit on another way to extend this blog! I'll make up a Momaholics Anonymous program! (Not that I ever worried I'd run out of material about mothering -- but this is BONUS that I'm creating *more* material as I go!!)

I pledge (repeat after me) to allow myself and the mothers in my life to learn from our mistakes in the safety and comfort of unconditional love in the no-judgement zone of my Mothering Support Group.

© Racnus | Dreamstime Stock Photos & Stock Free Images

I am so blessed to be able to list off several wonderful women (and the Main Man in my life) who make up my personal Mothering Support Group. Please, as you ponder the people who support you in your motherly role, list me, the Clueless Mama! I'm here for ya, gal!